What is 'Rushing' into Love?

Lisa and I had what most would call a whirlwind romance.  We met through an online dating service, which took quite a bit of luck in and of itself, and then we just FELL.  Before we even met in person we knew there was something interesting there, and after that first meeting, we both had fallen for each other.

We tried to keep from rushing as much as we could, and every time we did ‘hold back’ it would cause strife between us.  I still, to this day, catch grief for not wanting to say “I love you” first even though we both felt it.




In the end, I look back out our romance, and simply marvel at how fast it went.  Even now, though its seemed like years and years, we are about to hit our second anniversary of having met.  We’re married and doing wonderful, but it begs the question, what exactly is ‘rushing’ into love?

All the definitions of the word ‘rush’ all use words like ‘sudden,’ ‘swift,’ and ‘hurry.’  Though there was always a sense of urgency with Lisa and I, it felt drawn out over a vast amount of time.  When I remember that time, I fully remember how everything flowed naturally into the next thing.

I suppose THAT is how I know we did not rush.  There were no huge jumps that did not make sense.  The only thing unnatural that ever happened was us trying to slow it down.  If it hadn’t been for legal issues we probably would have been married in under a year, but such is the way of life.

To me, it would have been rushing if either of us would have been pushing forward.  I’ve seen many a relationship where one person or the other defines the relationship differently than the other.  There is nothing quite like the shock of finding out that you and your significant other are on different pages.

There is nothing more beautiful than being swept up by love’s swift currents and simply going with the flow.  It is comfortable, fun, and so simply amazing.  But one always has to keep their head about them.  You constantly have to make sure you are both on the same page, and both know any and all risks.


For what its worth, we knew time was flowing too slowly when we were together, so we were concious of us moving really fast in the relationship.  But what made it not ‘rushing’ was the fact that we knew it felt ‘right.’  The biggest thing to note, is that I had been in a few failed relationships, and I knew they were failing early on.  I knew the signs to look for, and I was shocked that there were none.

Normally, in every other relationship I’ve been in, there were obvious signs.  They would make me step back each time and have to make a decision to either be cool with it, confront it, deal with it, or understand that it was a deal breaker.  Throughout Lisa’s courtship of me (yes I DID just say it that way, *tongue out*) I never had to step back and make those decisions.

That is how I knew the relationship was ‘right.’  Lisa asks me from time to time why I didn’t marry the other girls, or why it didn’t come up.  And every time I tell her the same thing, “Things just weren’t ‘right’ with them.”  And its true.  For the first, and last time, I’m in a relationship that is completely right.  Everything about it is right.  We argue very infrequently, working past out differences in a very adult way.  We both know what the other expects from the relationship, and we both know what the other is willing to give.

Lisa knew it was going to work after our first kiss.  We both look at our life, and our marriage, and know that we could have gotten married earlier and been just as well off.  Our relationship moved quickly, no doubt, but the main thing is, we did not rush.  We went with the flow of love, and are still caught up in the currents of this mighty river.  This is what love should be, and I pity those that have never experienced this amazing feeling....