Insomnia sucks worse as you age. At least that’s how its been for me. Seems like so long ago, but I wrote a poem entitled Insomnia:
Insomnia, my dearest friend
The only friend that stays, in the end
Sleeplessness has stayed with me through thick and thin
It has always reminded me of the feeling of pain beneath my skin
It holds me tightly through the night
And listens to me sobbing about my plight
About how everyone important to me leaves
Giving me the rest of my life to greave
Luckily I have, at least, my friend Insomnia
To remind me, just how much I miss ya
It does kind of sum up what insomnia was before I found the happiness I have now. A time of thought about what I had lost. Now its just a time that I have no idea what to do with.
I suppose I should write, but I loath leaving the room in the middle of the night, so I’d have to do it on my netbook. But then, that’s one of the reasons I got the netbook, and its been a wonderful tool, as there’s really not been too many things nicer than writing on it, in the hammock, on a wonderful day.
But at night.... I guess I just don’t want the bright light of a computer glaring at me, but I can do nothing but toss and turn, and play on the iPhone. Its kind of crazy to think about, how I used to have so much to consume me when I couldn’t sleep, now I just start hurting and wishing the time would fade into sleep.
Of course, it gives me time to think up of new blogs, or new stories. Even though I had the next chapter of the Ballad in my head, I think I’m going to put one before it. But who knows. As of now, I have 3 more stories to tell after Old Debts concluded, and I can’t wait to get into them.
But replaying the opening sequence in my mind of a story, over and over and over again becomes draining and maddening. On top of that, the exhaustion that comes after waking is many more times immense. I guess its true what they say, growing old is not for the faint of heart....
How does insomnia effect you? Leave a comment and tell me if you use the time wisely, or toss and turn, or if you have that trouble at all! I find sleep fascinating, and lack of sleep is as interesting most times.
–Dan
