An Empty House

There was a moment, when being home alone was such a great concept.  You figure, as I blog from home, and I spend much of my time blogging in seclusion, that having the whole house to myself would help engineer more creativity.  Yet for some reason it doesn’t.

I guess its true them, I’m too much in love to be alone.  That’s one thing, I don’t think, any of my exes ever got.  I don’t like to be left alone.  Being in love with a person, really moves that person to the forefront of my life.  That person become my muse.  And without them casually interrupting me for something as simple as a kiss, I get distracted and start missing them.

Lisa has finally shown me this, that I truly do need someone to be around.  Some people think it’s a tad bit unhealthy, to be so attached, but to me, its quite natural.  I guess I never really noticed it before, and may that was a definite part as to why my other relationships failed so horribly.

Am I truly such a rare case?  I’ve seen Lisa in a bad mood, and completely pulled her out of it.  Sure, it’s a challenge, but it happens all the time.  Its how I’ve always been.  When a woman is going through ‘that time of the month’ for some reason, I tend to be good to keep around.  Surely that’s not just because I understand chemical and hormonal imbalances and how they play with moods and your one psyche....

Sure, I’m good to have around, but what if I’m in a bad mood, or frustrated?  People tend to steer clear of me.  I can be tyrannical and down right rude.  But Lisa is learning how to pull me out of it.  It’s a challenge, I’m sure, but that’s the only way I come out of my moods.  And if I’m left alone, it festers, and becomes worse....

I know that has been missing from former relationships.  The wonder of someone who can stand up to my moods, break through them, and pull me back into a state of happiness.  Was it really that hard to comprehend, all those years ago?  Maybe I am a really rare case, I do know many people who want to go and fester alone, and stew in their boiling juices, but I simply can’t.

Fact is, I need Lisa.  For the first time in my life, the inspiration I find is being used towards a good end.  Its focused, and forming, and becoming something it has never been.  My creativity has an outlet, and an audience.  Is there any wonder as to why I’m so happy?

So, what about you, dear reader?  Do you relish your ‘alone time’?  Do you even have any?  Or are you perpetually alone?  What brings out your creativity, is it a muse-like relationship, or those moments when you are alone and can find yourself again?

–Dan