Wednesday, September 9, 2015

I've Never Said I Was a Hero

Many times on my blog, including the future, I’ve written about the villains in my life.  I’ve had many, many people do me wrong over the years, or simply be evil people.  Every time I think I see one that is the winner, someone else shows up to take the cake.  From the drugged up woman whom I used to live next to that berated her children in public, to the mother-in-law, to my own dad, I’ve seen a ton of people do truly bullshit things to people or even to me.

But I’m here to say that I’m not immune to the evils.  In fact, I’ve never claimed to be a hero, I’ve been a villain in many a person’s story.  How could I be human and not be?  But in the end, I have to live the best life I can, and sometimes that means stepping on toes.

I still remember my old friends Sean and Rhonda.  Two pretty impressive people, married for some time when I met them, they had a small issue, they were living at his parent’s place.  It was taking a toll on their marriage, but finally they made it out, moving into their own place.  Soon after, marital troubles started. He was spending time with another woman from work, whom was married as well, and the wife had stopped enjoying home life.

From the outside it was obvious whom was at fault and what needed to happen.  I held my advice until I was asked, and she ended up following it, though she made sure my advice was just that, as she followed her own drummer.  After a run in with the guy, in a public place, he made veiled references that showed that he more or less blamed me for his marriage falling apart.  It was a shame, I really enjoyed his company, but such is life, that and I think he borrowed a book that I never got back, but that could have been someone else….

I’ve been around many a folk, in a work setting, that for some reason or another just didn’t like me.  Maybe I had good ideas, maybe I was temp, maybe people they respected me when they thought I didn’t deserve it.  For whatever reason, I had to put up with them railroading me in some format.  The time it was a boss, on their last day of work they made sure that I was leaving as well….

Sometimes I’m flat out unsure what makes me the villain.  Sometimes it’s just my physical presence.  One of the best times, well…best times to point at and say, “Look at this,” was a time in my teens when my friends and I met some girls to go to the movie.  It was just a hand shake, but the girl instantly responded.  She was revolted in fact.  Before we could even get inside she had her friends take her home.

That moment is something that is not all that uncommon.  There is something intense about me, there always has been.  Some people are drawn to it, some are scared away.  The ‘good’ psychics are quick to point it out, how my aura overpowers a room.  Who knows, maybe I missed my calling as a creeper/murderer type person.

All I know for sure is that quite a few children like me.  I have a way with cats, the ones that normally don’t like anyone will come to me.  People hating me is something I just have to live with.  It’s just part of life and to them all, I hope their lives are much better without me in it.  But then maybe I should just take it all as a compliment.  I mean, only the best people in the public eye have anti-them webpages….

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