A 38 Year Old College Student

I’m shocked at how much college has changed since I last when to it.  Of course, 1994 was 20 years ago, but still, I never thought it would change so much.  Part of me wonders if I just didn’t notice the things I love about school now because I was so blinded by trying to survive, but after talking to my friends, I don’t think that is the case….

It seems a million years ago when I stepped on the Austin campus of the University of Texas.  A million years and a day.  I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, but I was giving some things a shot, and it just didn’t work out.  I was naïve.  I picked something and just decided to go with it, truly the wrong decision.  To this day I do not regret my decision to walk away from college, in fact it was one of the best decisions I have ever made. 

Things that have to happen for me to Enjoy a Book

Everyone that knows me, knows that I’m a picky reader.  Its ingrained in me and nothing will ever change it.  I don’t enjoy wasting my time and I’ve left quite a few theaters because I refused to sit through a movie that was bad.

But movies are one thing, books are another.  Books require a commitment, in fact, any reading does.  It takes your full attention and concentration.  Good ones just yank those from you and push out the world all by themselves.  The fact is, good books are rare, and some of the ‘best’ books in history fall short of me wanting to spend any time on them at all.

(poem) - Nightmares

I remember dreams

Where I’d wake up alive

Landing safely upon the ground

After some fateful, deadly dive

I’m sure the screams

Woke my lover

Because of life’s

Living horror

I missed my chance

To die in the night

Being forced to life

Eternity’s blight

When death visits

In a World gone Mad

Those are the dreams

That are (supposed to be) the best I’ve ever had.

But the horror of living

On without you

Is upon me now

And there is nothing I can do

Alone

I fear it now

My bad dreams

Are nightmares of surviving

In a dreary world

Without loving

The world of before

Where living was a tedium

Of managing

Life’s great doldrums

Passing the time away

For when death finally comes

Playing games and watching TV

Ignoring my heart’s rhythmic drum

Yet now I have a reason

To truly live for each day

And I want to seize it all

In every sort of way

But the end of the dream will come

How can it not?

That end visits me in my dreams

Showing me life is all for naught

For in the end

That’s what dreams are for

To show us all the spectrums

Of what we most and least long for

--Dan

--Want more Poetry?  Check out my Poetry Collection Page!

A Return to College

For those of you who don't know, Lisa and I have returned to college.  Its one of the main reasons her and I vanished for so long with the blog, as we've been trying everything we could to stay afloat financially, while trying to decide what our future will hold.  Anyways, periodically I'm gonna through my essays and work online onto the blog just for the fun of it.

Our first assignment in English Comp 1, was to write an essay over our first day/week of college, picking an event and showing what it meant to you.  It was more of a participation grade, as we had to read other people's papers in class and tell the class what we got out of it.  Here is my essay, entitled A Return to College.

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The Loss of Artistry

One of the reasons why America sucks is because of the loss of artistry.  Most know that I’m a huge finger pointer when I go to point out that this country is going down hill fast, but honestly, there needs to be something done.

In 90% of the jobs out there, it seems, there is no need for art of any kind.  Just manual labor.  Do this and get paid for it.  But those that get promoted, normally, are the ones that think outside the box, the ones that see a solution to a problem no one had even noticed.