George Carlin once said:
“obedience and respect shouldn't be automatic. They should be earned, and based on the parent's performance. Some parents deserve respect, most of them don't, period.”I’ve always lived by that quote, because I’ve seen way too many parents who simply just don’t deserve the respect they think they should be getting, and I’ve seen some parents get say more respect than they deserve.
It’s a truly sad fact of life, but some parents just aren’t good parents. Luckily, somehow, I got two great parents. In their own way, they’ve been the two people I could count on to give me the support I needed, when I needed it. And sometimes they’ve tried to help me too much, and I’ve had to tell them no.
I’ve seen bad parents in my time, parents that berate, parents that force their children into a mold. And I’ve seen great parents, that support their kid’s every dream, and give good advice that is oftentimes ignored. I have parents that have not always understood me, but they’ve always decided I was far more important than their own accomplishments.
My aunt moved around much of her life, always blaming this gypsy blood, that made her want to keep on moving. Her and I have a kinship because I’ve been all over this country in search of where I think home might be. It seems like when I tried to settle, and give it my all, things conspired against me, and I watched it all slip through my fingers.
When I made that stand, and I first saw it slipping away, my parents jumped in without asking. When it slipped away a second time, they jumped in again. When it slipped away the third time, I said enough is enough. They will bare the financial burden for helping me in that failing dream for a very long time, and there’s no way I can ever repay them.
There’s no way I can ever repay them for anything. I had a sound, honest home growing up, and the freedom to do whatever I truly wanted. I learned many, many things from them, but more often than not, it was not what they wanted me to particularly learn. In these later years, that’s always been a measure of strife between us, as I grew into a far different person than my parents, even if I do have the same humor and temper as both of them.
The one thing, I learned above all, from my parents, is that the one thing paramount to them, is that I live the best, happiest life I can. In the end, I hope they understand that I blame them first and foremost for the happiness I’ve found in this life. No matter how I may chose to live, no matter where, I’ve found a happiness in life that most just do not have. I don’t know if it is my Mom’s humor, or my Dad’s sarcasm, but somehow, someway, I have laughed through every turmoil that has ever come my way. And through their example of how the live together, and love each other, I have found the perfect match for my soul in Lisa.
Maybe one day, they’ll be happy and proud that I’m truly happy, and understand that its not my accomplishments or failures that have brought me to where I am, but the childhood they allowed me to have. Its been a wonderful life, indeed, and no matter the drama, the strife, or the pain, it will only get better from here.
–Dan
